If you’re new to swinging, you may not be familiar with some of the different terms you’ll come across, such as Soft Swinging or Hard Swinging (aka Full Swap). Let me help explain what the difference is so it doesn’t catch you off guard.

smooth rocking

Most swingers start here and many stick with this type of swing. Soft rocking basically means anything goes except penetration with the other partner. Penetration is saved for his own partner.

So what fun can you have without penetration…? A lot!

It’s basically one extended foreplay session (Ted and I call it four-way foreplay, but without the guys playing with each other) with lots of kissing, stroking, and a ton of oral sex. playing with sex toys that’s okay too, including penetration with sex toys. The only thing prohibited is that a partner penetrates the other partner.

Some people also call staying completely with your own partner Soft Swinging, but that’s actually a form of Couples Voyeurism, usually mentioned in Swingers Profiles, as we like to watch and be watched.

Another inaccurate use of the expression Soft Swinging is when referring to couples where the ladies play exclusively or with very little interaction. This is actually known as a “Ladies Only Game”.

In fact, we met a full-swapping couple who just weren’t sure what exactly they could do with a couple who only do soft swapping, so we had to show them. Now this couple was thinking about giving up the lifestyle because it seemed like it wasn’t for them, until they discovered how much fun the soft swing could be.

Hard swinging or full swap

Just as the name implies, this form of swinging includes a full exchange or intercourse with the other partner. Some people never get to this point for reasons of their own, such as illness or intimacy issues, but many quite enjoy the full exchange.

It wouldn’t be me if I didn’t remind you right now that you should never have sex with another person without a condom, but I’m sure you’re smart enough to know that. It’s just not worth the chance.

Both forms of swinging can be done in the same room (so both couples are together) or in separate rooms. Even when you enjoy the experience of a threesome, you still have to decide whether to swing soft or hard. Everyone MUST agree as well.

Also do yourself a favor and talk about this before things end up in the bedroom (or whatever room they’re going to put together). There is nothing more uncomfortable than finding out that the person you are with and trying to put a condom on them is not willing to have sex with you. This conversation is much easier to have in a non-sexual environment.

That’s it, go out and have fun; just make sure both you and your partner are on the same wavelength before picking up a cute pair.

~ Play it safe, Ted and I always do